Interpreting the current state

.... of my head. It's difficult, it's confusing, something which I am obviously not used to, especially when it comes to this position I am in right now.

This is related to my previous post as well. Just interpreting the thoughts I have, and the right kind of actions to take, based on these thoughts, is kinda making me run in spirals.

I see the light, a ray of hope, sometimes, and I don't see it the rest of the times. Is it too early? Is it really worth it all? THAT is the confusion.

Do I pretend like nothing has happened at all? Do I just continue as it is and WAIT for something to happen? The WAIT always has a dependency, something which I do not want to have. I have always taken decisions, have made them knowing every single outcome. This time, it's different. Getting to the first stage of decision making is slowing things down.

I know I want this....

Need time..

-V